Have you ever turned in a report or paper and thought you were a shoo-in? Like Ralphie in “A Christmas Story,” I thought I had everything together when I went in for my physical this week.
I walked tall when I entered my doctor’s office. I had my blood sugar and insulin pump reports, and everything looked great. I had an overall average of 146 for the last month, and I was tickled pink.
During my appointment, I discussed my diabetes management with my doctor. I told her I had been slipping the past couple of months, but I was right on target this month. I had been exercising, eating right, and counting my carbs. I was even excited to get my blood work done because I couldn’t wait to see what my A1C would be.
So when I got my test results back, I was baffled to say the least. The note from my doctor said everything looked great, except my A1C was a little high, and I would need to follow-up with my endo when I see him in October. I skimmed down to my results and saw a whopping 7.1 at the bottom of the page.
I was devastated. I was expecting an A+ + + + + like Ralphie. Instead, I got a C+. I felt like I had been defeated. I was confused, scared, and frustrated all at once. How could this be? I had been trying so hard. If this is what my A1C looks like when I thought I was doing everything right, what more is there to do?
I know this may seem a bit dramatic for some people, but for those of you who know me, you know how hard I try to do the best I can. Sure, I had a few slip ups, but I thought I had fixed the error of my ways.
I had a decision to make. I could let this defeat me, or I could learn from this, pick myself up, and keep on going. For a while, I thought about the first option. I do have to admit, I’m not proud of this, but there was some wallowing and self-pity for a little bit. But then, after some more encouragement from my family and husband, I am trying again. Diabetes is a marathon after all.
(I also want to congratulate those who have had T1D for most of their life. I have only had it for about a year and a half now, and I’m exhausted.)
I am also hoping that some of my 7.1 is due to my previous months of not working out and eating well like I usually do, and it will go down by October.
So, Aaron and I have started a new workout regimen (which mainly involves just working out more), I am changing up my diet, and keeping a positive outlook.